The author writes about his experience redefining romantic relationships & friends vs. lovers. He spent time touring with his band, and notice the close bonds that were formed. His friendships were allowed to evolve in an unlimited number of ways, and they also had very few demands placed on the people in the relationship. This article explores how he decided to take these same characteristics and apply them to the romantic relationships in his life.
Louisa Leontiades (@AskLouloria) looks at how the mainstream media equates polyamory with sex, and how that has impacted people’s perception of the word polyamory. The author explains this is one of her reasons adopting the term relationship anarchy.
After Louisa Leontiades (@AskLouloria) wrote The Mass Exodus of Polyamorous People Toward Relationship Anarchy, some people felt as though the term relationship anarchy was being appropriated. This article reflects on that, and explains what relationship anarchy means to her.
The Thinking Asexual questions how to create equality in relationships with the words we use to describe them. The word “partner” has a lot of meaning attached to it from the monogamous world, meaning that relationship anarchy seeks to reject. With the limited words we have, what is the alternative to partner, girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, wife, etc.?
Ane Vegane’s article on DIY Conspiracy (@DIYconspiracy) writes about having ‘deep and uncompromising’ relationships with her friends. She has a great way of explaining how If we don’t use hierarchies, we won’t have ‘primary’ partners or ‘best’ friends. Relationships can unfold naturally, without expectations or strict boundaries.
Ian MacKenzie (@ianmack) interviews Mel Mariposa (@PolySingleish) to discuss relationship anarchy, developing community, and having authentic relationships. They get into some interesting stuff that you rarely read about in RA posts. There is also a transcript posted if you’re unable to listen.
The Thinking Asexual three types of non-monogamy: hierarchical polyamory, non-hierarchical polyamory and relationship anarchy. The differences between non-hierarchical poly and RA can be a confusing, this post goes over some of the reasons they are different. It also delves into how an RA might view non-romantic / nonsexual friendships.
Rob Martin (@version2beta) on @Medium explains consent using different scenarios, breaking it down into five categories: natural, explicit, implicit, delegated and appropriated. He writes that consent is a central tenet of relationship anarchy, and uses it to compare and contrast different relationship models to RA.
Written by Sadie Ryanne (@thedistantpanic) for The Scavenger (@thescavengermag). While she doesn’t use the term RA, this is an excellent article on non-normative relationships, and how infinite configurations are both possible and valid.
Stephanie Pappas in Scientific American (@sciam) discusses how research on the poly community is growing. Scientist are finding that compared to monogamous folks, poly people are better at communicating and self reflection, and practice safer sex. Best quote from the article: "People in these relationships really communicate. They communicate to death.”
Although this piece by Briallen Hopper (@briallenhopper) on @TheCut doesn’t mention relationship anarchy at all, it is a really well written and thoughtful piece about the way society values couples over friendships. As someone who has always put a ton of energy into my friendships, this article really spoke to me.
A very good article by The Critical Polyamorist (@CriticalPoly), where she examines her relationship with nonmonogamy, how she has struggled against a couple-centric, rule bound society and how she works daily against her conditioned monogamy.
Louisa Leontiades (@AskLouloria), who runs the blog Postmodern Woman, has written some great articles about relationship anarchy. In this post, she is interviewed by Mel (@PolySingleish) and they talk about her writing, non monogamy in Europe, living outside the norm, and self reflection.