Originally posted in 2006 on a Swedish website. Written by Andie Nordgren (@nordgren), one of the first people to use the term relationship anarchy. This is a great starting point for someone just starting to look into RA. It has nine short paragraphs that cover the basics, from valuing each relationship independently to designing commitments that work in your life.
The Thinking Asexual has a lot of good blog posts, and much of what is written about how asexuals experience relationships is relevant to RA, particularly in regards to not elevating one type of relationship above another. This blog post offers an overview, lots of definitions and examples, and an explanation of how RA applies to asexuals, aromantics, mixed orientation sexual people, and celibates.
Is the most romantic thing you can say to a partner ‘I don’t need you’? This is a short post about dismantling the idea of That Special Someone, and keeping people in your life because you want them there, not because you need things from them.
Louisa Leontiades (@AskLouloria) looks at how the mainstream media equates polyamory with sex, and how that has impacted people’s perception of the word polyamory. The author explains this is one of her reasons adopting the term relationship anarchy.
After Louisa Leontiades (@AskLouloria) wrote The Mass Exodus of Polyamorous People Toward Relationship Anarchy, some people felt as though the term relationship anarchy was being appropriated. This article reflects on that, and explains what relationship anarchy means to her.
The Thinking Asexual questions how to create equality in relationships with the words we use to describe them. The word “partner” has a lot of meaning attached to it from the monogamous world, meaning that relationship anarchy seeks to reject. With the limited words we have, what is the alternative to partner, girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, wife, etc.?
The Thinking Asexual three types of non-monogamy: hierarchical polyamory, non-hierarchical polyamory and relationship anarchy. The differences between non-hierarchical poly and RA can be a confusing, this post goes over some of the reasons they are different. It also delves into how an RA might view non-romantic / nonsexual friendships.
Rob Martin (@version2beta) on @Medium explains consent using different scenarios, breaking it down into five categories: natural, explicit, implicit, delegated and appropriated. He writes that consent is a central tenet of relationship anarchy, and uses it to compare and contrast different relationship models to RA.
What if we don’t need a ‘best friend’ or a ‘true love’? What if we had discussions with everyone in our life about our boundaries? @saulofhearts on @Medium applies principles of polyamory (and RA) to see how they can elevate all our relationships.
Mel Mariposa (@PolySingleish) writes about the downside of Radical Self Reliance, one of the ten principles of Burning Man. She examines the problems with placing individuals above community, and how intimacy and compassion suffer when Radical Self Reliance trumps connecting to the people around you.
Dr. Charlie Glickman (@charlieglickman), a sex educator and author of The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure, wrote a blog post about Consent Accidents, which he defines as different from consent violations. Consent accidents ‘happen because of error, miscommunication, misunderstanding, or not having all the information.’ What should we do if we violate a person’s consent accidentally? This post gives some suggestions on how to navigate.
Franklin Veaux (@franklinveaux), author of More Than Two (@MTTbook) explores the difference between rules and boundaries, and how we can use direct communication to get our needs met without stepping on the needs of others.